Tagged….

Was tagged for this on the baby blog, so did it meekly. And then realised it fitted in better out here, so here it comes. Moppets Mom, you were right. Enjoy.

It perhaps says a lot about what people think of one’s equation with the male populace when they want me to answer 22 earthshattering questions about what men want to know about women. And when three lovely ladies ask me to do the same thing, it does rather go right to my head, which is so swollen right now, you could put me on a string and I’d float happily with you wherever you want to take me. So MadMomma, Moppets Mom and Itchingtowrite here goes my version of the questionnaire. And god help any male who dares ask me these questions. Afterall, am respectable married woman.

1. How do you feel after a one night stand?
Depends on whether I wore my stilettoes or not
2. Do you ever get used to wearing a thong?
Butt floss. Never a great idea.
3. Does it hurt?
Women are strong. We can take it.
4. Do you know when you are acting crazy?
If I dont realise it, you’re around to let me know. Loudly.
5. Does size really matter?
Of course. Especially when it comes to carats.
6. When the bill comes are you still a feminist?
I am not a feminist. I am a kept woman. I will always give the male the privilege of being the provider. I will feed the male ego.
7. Why do you take so long to get ready?
Well, I am always ready. Such infinite beauty never needs primping.
8. Do you watch porn, too?
I’d rather not watch. I’m a prude. I reserve that pleasure for those who dont get enough.
9. Will something from Tiffany’s solve everything?
No. Everything from Tiffany’s might solve something though.
10. Are guys as big of a mystery to you as you are to us?
Oh yes, you strong, silent, I have no conversation to share types. You get me into a blathering mess.
11. Why do you sometimes think you look fat?
Maybe because I really do. And you dont let me forget it.
12. Why are you always late?
I am never late. I make an entrance.
13. Does it bother you when we scratch?
Who cares. Just do it when I am not watching or I might be forced to comment.
14. Do you wish you could pee standing up?
Why? So I need to wash my hands everytime?
15. Why do so many women cut their hair short as soon as they get married?
They’ve now got their husbands to add extra weight to their heads
16. How often do you think about sex?
How many minutes are there in a day???
17. What do you think of women who sleep with guys on the first date?
More power to them.
18. Would you?
Maybe, if my first date was with Richard Gere.
19. Do you realize every guy wants a girl just like his mom?
Why? Are they masochists?
20. Why does every woman think she can change him?
Women are always giving the important things in their lives a makeover. Men included.
21. Does it matter what car I drive?
No. It matters what car you gift me.
22. Do you ever fart?
Eww no. That plant next to me just did.

And now will tag Childwoman, Average Jane and Dipali to take the baton further…

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About Kiran Manral

Author of The Face At The Window, ( 2016), Karmic Kids, All Aboard (2015) , Once Upon A Crush (2014) and The Reluctant Detective (2011).
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5 Responses to Tagged….

  1. Cee Kay says:

    He he! You’ve done a great job of tackling the tag 😀 Seriously, I don’t think the guy expected all desi behenjis to attack him with such gusto 😛 I don’t think he is even aware of our tag making the rounds but still…

    Like

  2. Average Jane says:

    And I am going to post my meme here! Thanks for tagging me though I am very bad at memes and don’t generally like doing them.

    How do you feel after a one night stand?
    Bloody damned good! Someone still wants me for one of those?
    2. Do you ever get used to wearing a thong?
    Didn’t wear it long enough to get used to it.
    3. Does it hurt?
    Pain is all in the mind, darlings.
    4. Do you know when you are acting crazy?
    Yes and also the whys and wherefores of it.
    5. Does size really matter?
    You betcha! And don’t let any men’s magazine tell you any different.
    6. When the bill comes are you still a feminist?
    “I am not a feminist. I am a kept woman. I will always give the male the privilege of being the provider. I will feed the male ego.” I cannot better this by Kiran!
    7. Why do you take so long to get ready?
    It’s called Foreplay, my love.
    8. Do you watch porn, too?
    No, the Dicovery channel shows the same and the animals there are far cuter and real to boot.
    9. Will something from Tiffany’s solve everything?
    No harm in trying.
    10. Are guys as big of a mystery to you as you are to us?
    Yes, we wonder how is it you have no thoughts worth sharing.
    11. Why do you sometimes think you look fat?
    Well, you could tell me I don’t, huh?
    12. Why are you always late?
    When you are as old as I am, one tends to forget things like dates.
    13. Does it bother you when we scratch?
    No, as long as you don’t comment when I do or better still don’t ogle.
    14. Do you wish you could pee standing up?
    Yes, especially nowadays that my knees have started creaking.
    15. Why do so many women cut their hair short as soon as they get married?
    It is a reverse Samson thing.
    16. How often do you think about sex?
    Nowhere near as many times as you do but definitely in all the wrong places.
    17. What do you think of women who sleep with guys on the first date?
    Probably had a train to catch the next morning.
    18. Would you?
    If I had a train to catch the next morning.
    19. Do you realize every guy wants a girl just like his mom?
    Well, he gets her, doesn’t he?
    20. Why does every woman think she can change him?
    That is what shopping is all about.
    21. Does it matter what car I drive?
    One hell of a lot. And the latest model, if you please.
    22. Do you ever fart?
    Why wouldn’t I? You want me to be like your mom, right?

    Like

  3. childwoman says:

    Tag done Kiran….!

    Like

  4. dipali says:

    done!

    Like

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