Pure venting post… please excuse

It is that time of the year when you have the looming prospect of the summer large before you, and absolutely no immediate plans of possible fruition involving you, the hubby and the child, aboard an aircraft, a train or even damn it, in the car on a long road trip to exotic places, where you can wash the grime accumulated by the year’s stress off. Havent been on a holiday for five years. Since the brat was a foetus. Ever since, we’ve been on holidays which normally involve an entire jamboree of family and two to three carloads of people, which is great fun, but sometimes you yearn not to be woken up at six am because bright and sparkly people in the group want to hotfoot it around dead and ruined forts. One would like to down one’s Breezers without the disapproving gaze and clacking tongue of the one who must not be named. One would like to chill in a pair of shorts and a vest on the beach, without needing to be labelled a crimson, scarlet and purple woman just because one has dared to expose an ankle. In simple language, one would want to be on a holiday with only husband and child for company.

But then the negatives of such a holiday are manifold. For one, there will be no other children around. Which means one will be sole caretaker and entertainment provider to the brat. Which means additionally, that one will actually not be able to down any of them Breezers given that at least one of the party needs to be sober and sane to run around in the circles that is the lot of the person assigned to watch over the mini man. That also means one will be dead to the world and snoring with exhaustion before the husband is done with his rounds of drinks, and therefore in no state of being for any romancing. Which also means that the brat will be sleeping in with us again in the hotel room, and thus prone to wakening at the most inconvenient moments when the bedsheets have been discarded along with the clothes in the hope that gentle snores signal deep sleep. Which also means that, if god forbid, a fever or a bout of food poisoning strikes, I am the only whole and soul left to do the mopping up of vomit from every available surface, while the husband sulks at the prospect of a ruined holiday at the bar. No, no, he’s not the lush this post is making him out to be.

Therefore one is in a right quandary. Dare one suggest an escapade just with the three of us, or do the right honourable thing and invite the legion to join in? Or should one just sulk at home while friends insist on filling you in with the infuriarating details of how they had such a wonderful time on their trip with their infuriatingly well behaved children who sleep on dot, and dont throw tantrums and dont need a second by second supervision.

Ugggghhhh. I need a holiday right now from everyone. Including me.

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About Kiran Manral

Author of The Face At The Window, ( 2016), Karmic Kids, All Aboard (2015) , Once Upon A Crush (2014) and The Reluctant Detective (2011).
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17 Responses to Pure venting post… please excuse

  1. chandni says:

    do it, already.

    Holiday with just the 3 of you sounds lovely. And no, nothing will go that horribly wrong.

    Go away! Really!!!!!!!!!

    Do it, NOW.

    Like

  2. kiranmanral says:

    Oh Chandni, I wish it were that simple. But tis not something I can fill you in with the details on here. When we meet I shall tell you how we are a Barjatya films family….

    Like

  3. What about a one night getaway..or a weekend to Mahabhaleshwar or something..if an elaborate holiday isnt possible?? And yeah the entire jingbang neednt be invited for this one for sure?

    Like

  4. dipali says:

    I loved your last line- ‘a holiday from everyone.Including me’.

    If only one could leave the whole angsty package behind, be totally
    unburdened by self and others.

    You have my total empathy, my dear.

    Like

  5. dipali says:

    Hey Kiran. Just read your comment at Chandni’s.
    Cheer up. We need our upbeat Kiran who can laugh at herself through
    the toughest of tough situations. Bounce back, please.
    One big FAT hug coming up.

    Like

  6. divya says:

    longtime lurker, first-time commenter.

    I need a holiday too, my life grows worse by the minute.

    Law school is overrated.

    Hope you get your holiday soon, I’m not likely to get mine. 🙂

    Like

  7. alka says:

    I agree with Chandni. Do it NOW!!!
    Ever since we moved back to India, once a year, for two weeks max, me and hubby take off to exotic lands( been to Bahamas, Jamaica, Cancun…). The boys stay with Daadi or Naani who come over to stay with them at my house. The maid and driver are ordered to be on their toes 24/7. So they’re in their own environment, with their own toys, etc etc and I ALWAYS go during summer vacation and never stay away for more than 10/11 days. My younger one will be 4 in May. So he’s almsost the same age as brat. Maybe Naani/Daddi can take care of him for a week or so. It might sound absurd to you but it’ll do you a world of good. Maybe the filmy type Barjataya family can pitch in and watch him while u’re gone. Trust me, kids are very resilient.
    That’s my two-cent. Hope you don’t kick me on the head for asking you to abandon your child. lol!!

    Like

  8. alka says:

    My ‘two-cents’. Kick me ‘in’ the head. Geez!! I’m losing it. I hate it when I make such errors. 😦

    Like

  9. d says:

    Hi Kiran, how about inviting a couple(or one) of the older cousins to come along, get the three kids their own room (they’ll feel all grown up!) and that way you have the brat with you but not ALL the time. And he has others entertaining him. also, a lot of resorts have some great organised entertainment where kids are well taken care of atleast some of the time. Also the naani-daadi watching him while you go on a short trip with hubby, is a good idea!

    Like

  10. Random Vignettes says:

    Hey Kiran, yeah I echo the others here. How possible would it be to leave the Brat for just a weekend while you and hubby go to any nearby place..that way any feeling of guilt will be minimized coz of the short duration AND u get a break…which woman, I think, you should indulge yourself in. Na? There shud be a time when we all get to think and do things only for ourselves without wondering abt anything else.

    *sigh*

    And if ever u manage to do so, can u pls pass on some wisdom my way as well??

    Like

  11. Kiran Manral says:

    Gooddaysunshine: Too complicated. Will explain in detail when we meet, if ever.

    Dipali: Need a trampoline right now. Am at my lowest point ever. Lots of crap happening. The husband and I are just so disgusted and Had It Up To Here.

    Divya: Here’s praying you get your holiday and I get mine.

    Alka: I wish I could. The retinue of servants is here with daadi who will not even let brat sleep a night with her, and will watch over him for maybe an hour. Naani is 70 plus and lives alone with no maids, even does her own jhadu pocha, but is ever too willing to handle the bratall on her own. In fact he is always dropped to nana house if I need time for a simple lunch with friends. I cant inflict him on her for so long unassisted. And she will not come over here to my place. Understand yaar, families…anyway, he is also prone to febrile convulsions so everyone is antsy about taking complete responsibility for him.

    D: We do that. He has a wonderful cousin who is a motherhen to him, and wonderful buas who take him over completely when we are on vacay together, but the critter wants his mamma and pappa next to him when he sleeps. The point actually is rekindling the romance…which is now dead and buried and probably getting vampiric.

    RV: Would love to, but complications. I guess I just have to wait till the fellow is older and wiser and more manageable before he can be left behind with other responsible adults.

    Like

  12. Aparna says:

    Leave the brat with the legion and take off with your husband for a weekend. That will surely bring the much needed relaxation without the guilt of not inviting the legion or leaving the brat behind!

    Like

  13. alka says:

    Awww…Kiran!! I wish I could help you out. That’s bc I didn’t understand the power of these vacations until the hubby forced me to do it the 1st time. He literally dragged me away from the kids. I thought they’d be heartbroken and I’d have no fun. But I was so wrong. They did great and I had fun and the romance back in my life. I do understand about febrile convulsions though. My older one had one when he was 3. Ended up calling 911 and with them rushing to the hospital at midnight. Thankfully, that episode never repeated itself. I’ve read that the child is at risk till 5 years or so. So he’ll be over that age soon. As for the Daadi, I’m still shaking my head…….

    Like

  14. Mala says:

    Delurking..
    Could you “arrange” a weekend trip to a friend’s wedding out of town? Or some other sort of ceremony. Short enough to not be interesting to the jingbang, and it would be natural to not invite them to come along.
    Bah – we should have had you come across to Delhi for the Bean’s birthday!
    Mala

    Like

  15. Kiran Manral says:

    Aparna: actually, the legion is all very sweet. They adore the brat and take great care of him. But they all come down from different parts of the country to be with us during the summer, and that has been the trend for the past 12 years. This year am going to break the routine. More on that on my next post.

    Alka: yeah, thats what I’m thinking, a year more. Maybe. I have no hassles leaving the brat behind am all for him being on his own. But am a little antsy about the convulsions, he’s been hospitalised five times already for them. Its terrifying isnt it, I die everytime I see him like that. A year more.

    Mala: I have to try something soon or will explode. Maybe just pick up brat and go somewhere on my own, without hubby. LOL.

    Like

  16. Cee Kay says:

    Hmmm. I am sure I left a comment here. Where’d it go??

    Like

  17. Cee Kay says:

    I’m sure I left a comment here earlier and then one just a few minutes ago. Where’d they go?

    Dont know. Will check spam, a lot of perfectly valid comments these days are being swallowed up by spam.

    Like

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