A happy birthday to me…

So it is officially on me. The fact that I am a big fat liar, and that the header on this blog needs desperately to be changed immediately to thirtysevenandcounting if I am an honest child and worthy of my mother’s trust and the values of honesty and fair play she inculcated in me, etc, etc.

Given that my first immediate fight or flee reaction to hitting 37 is to run to the registrars office and make fake birth certificates which lower me down ten years, I guess nothing the mother ever taught me has sunk in. 

 Why is it that 37 suddenly make me feel I need to take a scotchtape and put it along the hairline to pull the falling face up? 36 didnt feel all that bad, given that a lot of falling happened with the body, and most of it falling that no amount of wishful thinking or visits to plastic surgeons and such like could have put back in place.

It is a fear that an increasingly youth centric society is foisting on me, the fear that I am getting long in the teeth and curved in the spine. That the face is getting character lines which show more character than I would like it too. That the cobwebs beneath the eyes have become nice and latticed and crinkly. And no amount of soft patting on of undereye cream is doing anything to salvage the situation, except keep me from snoring five minutes more. Also the fact that any cream I buy has to, by virtue of necessity, have to say ANTI AGEING in big capital letters somewhere on the label. Which also means I end up not buying a lot of hair products because none of them have anything going for ageing hair. Come on, there is a niche market out there for us ageing hair types. I can just see the ads, bouncing, glowing youthful hair type walks past leching model type who taps said bouncing hair on shoulder. Bouncing hair turns around, and lech model type male gasps open mouthed, “Dadima??” and falls dramatically to the pavement, clutching left side of chest tom imply immediate coronary due to the shock caused by the realisation that he had been hitting on his grandmom. Of course, a life insurance and a low fat oil could also split costs of production and airtime on this commercial. Now there’s another thought, a couple of products join hands to have a lovely narrative that interests the viewers and bungs in two to three brands so we dont have to suffer onslaught on onslaught of mindless drivel ads that get repeated ad infinitum ad nauseum. Ah, I digress again.

To return to the point. I am now doing a rehaul of the role models in the mind’s cavern. Demi Moore? Sharon Stone? Monica Belluci? Madonna?

Yup, yup, throw in an Ashton Kutcher, and I’m game to be over 40. Never mind the latticed eyes.

 

 

 

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About Kiran Manral

Author of The Face At The Window, ( 2016), Karmic Kids, All Aboard (2015) , Once Upon A Crush (2014) and The Reluctant Detective (2011).
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20 Responses to A happy birthday to me…

  1. Bangaloremom says:

    Oh come on Lady K!! You ARE a big, fat liar…and I say this with conviction bcos u look STUNNING and all the groans and gasps on ageing hair and wrinkly face that you claim to have are lies and u can still give much younger women a run for their money and dont u know it! Have urself a VERRY happy belated budday, K!

    Like

  2. Poppins says:

    A very very hapy birthday to the sexiest 37 year old woman I know!

    Like

  3. chandni says:

    too much nautanki no?

    U’re gorgeous and u know it 🙂

    many many happy returns of the day!

    Like

  4. Mona says:

    haha, i love the dadima ad idea! it would sell like hot cakes!
    happy 37th, hot stuff 🙂

    Like

  5. Happy Birthday K 🙂
    You are the most gorgeous looking 37 year old that I know 🙂

    Like

  6. happpppppppppy happpppppppy birthday kiran!!!!:D hope u have a looowely year ahead!:D

    Like

  7. NainaAshley says:

    Have a great Birthday Kiran!
    And yes, I’m not buying the wrinkles and hair story. I have seen your pictures and video clip and you look great!
    LOL at the ad idea.

    Like

  8. Devaki says:

    Saw your interview on youtube recently (the one you had posted a link to) – you look gorgeous, woman! What lines are you talking about? 🙂

    – Longtime lurker delurking to wish you a very Happy Birthday!

    Like

  9. Chips says:

    Many, many wonderful birthday wishes!!

    PS – I have my own ‘Ashton Kutcher’ !! 😉

    Like

  10. Gauri says:

    Many happy returns of the day Kiran 🙂

    Just so that you feel that wee lil bit better (not that you need to cos I don’t buy that wrinkles story one bit) I’m ahead in the numbers game here 😀

    37 going on 38 ……… that’s me !!

    Like

  11. sneha says:

    happy birthday Kiran! i hope when i turn 37, i have atleast some of the sense of humour that you have. have a great day.

    Like

  12. randomvignettes says:

    You know if when I get to be 37 and if I happen to be even vaguely as stylish and put together as you are..then I shall die a happy happy women.

    And besides these days, 40 is the new 30 anyways!

    Like

  13. Agree with RV, 37 is the new 27. And face the truth, you look so awesome that all this talk of aging simply doesn’t apply to you. A very happy birthday to a very beautiful person, both inside and out.

    Like

  14. Priyanka says:

    Happy birthday!! Hope you have a lovely year ahead!
    Loved the ‘dadima’ idea. Very funny and it might work!
    So, what did you get this birthday 😉

    Like

  15. Average Jane says:

    Hey, happy birthday. Come on, you know deep down we are getting sexier by the minute, it’s just that some men can tell and some of the dumb ones can’t and we have the smart ones, right?!!

    Like

  16. Deepti says:

    Happy Birthday Kiran .. Delurking for the first time but a regular reader 🙂

    Like

  17. Kiran Manral says:

    Bangaloremom: Thanks darling, you girls are so good for an insecure ageing vain little ego.

    Poppy: Thanks darling, obviously, I need to show your
    comment to the husband.

    Mandira: Thanks dear.

    Chandu: Whats life without nautanki? Thanks dear. Old age needs reassurance.

    Mona: Am brilliant at ideation. Pity no one recognises this latent talent. LOL. Thanks dear.

    Anu: Thanks dear, you make me feel good.

    Naina, Devaki: You tube is back to bite me on the butt. Thanks dear.

    Chips: Thanks dear, arent you the lucky one. I’ll hang on to my Richard Gere, thank you.

    Gauri: And a gorgeously elegant 38 you are too! Thanks dear.

    Sneha: Thanks dear.

    RV: You know the stylish thing is just a myth. On an average day I am eminently passable without second glance on street. But thanks, yes, 40 is the new 30. Hopefully by the time I get there 50 will become the new 30 too.

    Rita: Thanks dear. You make me feel so good about ageing.

    Priyanka: Thank you, yup, am an idea queen. bag and sunglasses from Guess. Bling bling ones.

    Jane: Dont know whether I have the smart one! I think I have the dumb one.

    Like

  18. age is reality
    youth is mind set/ attitude
    u rock anyday

    Like

  19. booboosmamma says:

    Happy birthday kiran. i know you look fabulous.

    Like

  20. themunchkinblog says:

    Happy Birthday Kiran 🙂
    -Avanti

    Like

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