Heart breaking moment this morning. Beautiful pair of Next denims. With coarse thread detailing on back pockets. And contrast seams. The sort that you need a stetson and a pair of boots with spurs to complete the look. Lying in the cupboard for a couple of years since no occasion ever felt perfect enough for them to be worn to. This morning by strange fluke or mischance they happened to land straight within eyeshot and I was in a brave benevolent mood. So I took them out.
The husband snorted. Meanly. I should have taken that as a warning. The sort that animals give before there’s going to be an earthquake. You know bark wildly and run scared, tail between their legs. But, me being me, have never learnt to read earthly signs of doom and proceeded to do my changing with the man in the room. As any woman knows. This in itself is an act of bravery. In the first flush of lust, this could take an additional fifteen minutes into getting ready time. When you’re eighteen years past the first flush of lust, you just avert your eyes and get hopping and wriggling into your clothes hoping the other isnt noticing your flesh jiggling.
The damn pant stopped at my knees. I say stopped. I gasped in surprise. It just stopped like a mule and refused to go up further. I looked at my thighs in surprise. Sure they looked ‘healthier’ to me than they’ve looked in a while, but surely I was not that healthy that a pair of denims bought a couple of years ago couldnt get past them knees?
I tried again. I did a little hop and wriggle and the kind that Sridevi patented in Nagina. By which time the husband was thrashing around on the floor in what could only be termed a laughing fit of sorts. Which I sternly and pointedly ignored. And then I gave up all pretence and struggle and sleekly slipped into old favourite D&Gs, them being eminently slip into able considering their lycra has truly and completely given way.
And picked up my ego from the floor whence I was writhing like a snake woman a couple of minutes ago and proceeded to bin it. If I may say so, I looked smashing in them D&Gs. Rubens would have made an oil painting of me.
About Kiran Manral
Kiran Manral is a writer and major social media influencer. After quitting her full-time journalist’s job when her son was born, Kiran became a mommy blogger on the internet, with a remarkably original voice. She was a journalist at The Asian Age, The Times of India, features editor Cosmopolitan, India Cultural Lead and Trend spotter at Gartner Iconoculture US, Senior Consultant at Vector Insights, Ideas Editor, SheThePeople.TV. Kiran is currently a celebrated author and an independent research and media consultant.
She was shortlisted for the Femina Women Awards for Literary Contribution in 2017. The Indian Council of UN Relations (ICUNR) supported by the Ministry of Women and Children, Govt of India, awarded her the International Women’s Day Award 2018 for excellence in the field of writing. In 2021 she was awarded the Womennovator 1000 Women of Asia award. In 2022, she was named amongst the 75 Iconic Indian women in STEAM by Red Dot Foundation and Beyond Black, in collaboration with the Office of the Principal Scientific Advisor, Government of India, and British High Commission, New Delhi.
Her novella, Saving Maya, was long-listed for the 2018 Saboteur Award, supported by the Arts Council of England in the UK. Her novels 'The Face At the Window’ and ‘Missing, Presumed Dead were both long-listed for Jio MAMI Word to Screen, and ‘The Face at the Window’ was showcased at the South Asian Film Festival 2019. The Kitty Party Murder was shortlisted for the Popular Choice award at the 2021 JK Papers TOI AutHER awards.
Her other books include The Reluctant Detective, Once Upon A Crush, All Aboard, Karmic Kids-The Story of Parenting Nobody Told You, A Boy’s Guide to Growing Up, True Love Stories, 13 Steps to Bloody Good Parenting, Raising Kids with Hope and Wonder in Times of a Pandemic and Climate Change, More Things in Heaven and Earth and Rising: 30 Women Who Changed India. She also has published short stories in various magazines, in acclaimed anthologies like Have A Safe Journey, Boo, The Best Asian Speculative Fiction 2018, Grandpa’s Tales, Magical Women and City of Screams. Kiran lives in Mumbai with her family.
Social media handles
Twitter: https://twitter.com/KiranManral
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kiranmanral/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/KiranManralAuthorPage
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kiranmanral/
Fortytwoandcounting 
OMG I totally feel your pain. Have a black strapless dress I bought for a birthday when I was fitter two years ago. I didn’t wear it then for it wasn’t the birthday I imagined it would be!
And it hangs unused but tried on several times…and of course I look like Bianca Castafiora when I try it on now…but it still inspires me each time I look at it. Bet I’ll give up in a couple more years…! :-‘(
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Sharrup. You look smashing in whatever you wear. No one’s peering at your size labels.
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When beautiful women like you start complaining, think about what I would have to complain about…tsk, tsk. Go to the mirror and repeat, “I am very beautiful and I love me”. Go on.
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You are totally scaring me. I’m due in December, if you are torturing yourself with what to wear, imagine my plight?! (For the record, I was never skinny, always chubby)
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awwwwwwwwww I am sure u’ll look dapper in anything u wear. Honest!
Chuck those old ones, time to buy new stuff 🙂
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Amusing the spouse while changing should be avoided, methinks:)
The poor jeans were not destined for you(:
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roflmao
why didn’t i find your blog earlier?
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oh Kiran, don’t you know. Jeans tend to shrink over time. That’s what happened, babe. Blame the jeanns.
Yup. And the aliens too.
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i’m with dottie. jeans shrink you know. ignore ’em. we’re just rubenesque. thats it.
Huh, look who’s talking. Skinny minny you.
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we like the jeans shrinking bit women are talking about here!
and if jeans can, all other clothes can too! :p
cheers!
abha
Yup, its a conspiracy by aliens to shrink our clothes up so we’re left with nothing to wear.
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Hi Kiran,
Couldn’t find your email id anywhere so had to ask here. Am looking for a fake Bottega Veneta. I had been to Colaba Causeway a couple of weeks back but couldn’t find any shop that was selling any fakes! Any idea where to get one there? Some of the by-lanes? I remember that you had posted that Colaba Causeway was the ideal place for such things on your shopaholics anonymous blog. Help!!
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I have a pair of brown trousers which sit snug in my closet, I hate the fact that I want to wear it but I do not want to even try it and feel sad ( all over again)
I so need to lose weight!
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