Jan 4 1996. I made the most unseemly bride ever, no tears, except for when the smoke from the havan played havoc with them contact lenses. You were the handsomest creature in a pair of pants I had ever seen. And you knew it. Modesty was, and still is, definitely not an adjective associated with you.
I sat the other day to count down the years. We met in Jan 1991. We fought like cat and dog for six years till we decided to get married. Got married in Jan 1996. And have continued the cat and dog act since, with a squealing puppy added to the fray. We have spent now together as many years together as I was when we met. A lifetime together. It has slipped past so quickly I barely realised it.
You have changed. You are calmer, mellower, more understanding. I would like to think it is my cooking that changed you. Anyone who survives that on a regular basis would be a changed man. Counting his blessings to be hale and hearty. You have learnt to read through people. It has disillusioned you for sure, but it has not made you cynical. You still help beyond what you can afford. Being disillusioned hasnt stopped you. Seriously though, you are not brash anymore. But you are not young anymore. Your hair still, touchwood, a thick head of silver. To me you are still the same as the boy I smiled at all those years, outside the ladies common room. Long love story folks, suffice to say, Rajshri films had not a patch on us. The most major shift for me? You have become a reader. I have not become athletic or sporty in return though. I always maintained you changed yourself for me more than I did for you. Or did we both do a little give and take to fit into each others lives? If there was an effort it wasnt an effort. It happened.
I’m sure I have changed too. For one. The silhouette in profile is now a tree trunk. For another I have more lines on my face than the roadmap of India in relief. For a third I no longer care about stepping out without putting my lenses in. Which means I step out with my spectacles. In the days of yore, I didnt dare stand in the balcony without the lenses in. Yup. I dont spend half my waking hours contemplating the face or the wardrobe anymore. Well maybe onefourth the waking hours. Not much left for contemplation anyway therefore, not worth the effort.
We have both changed. We can now sit in a closed room together and have our clothes on for the entire duration. We can now have a conversation without it guaranteed to end with one of us ending up in a sulk or a grump. We can, gasp, actually agree to disagree. Could it be possible, do you think, we have actually grown up? Grown up together? Or we were forced to grow up to be parents? Couldnt have the child being brought up by two children, could we?
Just wanted to tell you I am so thankful to have you as my husband. You support me, indulge me, tick me off and keep me grounded. You pamper me and yet push me to my limits. Its been a great ride. Through the bumps and the smooths. Thank you for being the wonderful person you are. And yes, you still make my heart go bumpity bump when you walk into the room. My handsome dude.