Do you buy your man’s undies?

According to a Reuters news report, a poll conducted by UK retailer Debenhams, men only buy their underwear if they are still trying to entice new partners into a relationship. Most men leave underwear buying to their mothers until their are 19 and then buy for themselves until they get into a stable relationship, and then on expect the women in their lives to buy their underwear. The report says if your man leaves his underwear buying to you, it is a clear signal that you are the one.

I agree. But I did not get into underwear buying territory until post marriage. I think I was already The One for a few years before I got married. But those were the days of my youth, and more innocent times, and if it was even suggested I go underwear shopping for the man, I was quite capable of getting an attack of the vapours. I am ashamed to say I was quite the typical vapid innocent. Time has sure changed a lot of things. Including vapidity.

I was also informed by the mother in law once I was married, that along with the metaphoric ‘tijori ki chavi’ I was also handed over the honorable task of underwear buying for the man, because, quote, “left to him, he will never buy himself a pair and wear torn and tattered undies, that are an embarassment to hang out on the clothesline.”

What does this say about men?

Off the bat, they’re lazy. They will spend hours investigating various mobile phone models and comparing features but not spend a couple of minutes in the underwear section of the same departmental store to pick up a pack of four.

Secondly, they couldnt care less if the pairs they have in their drawers are peppered with cheeseholes, with the elastic falling off, or are some indeterminate hue after years of being washed with the colours.

And yes, I think, we wives can safely add socks and handkerchiefs to underwear in the list of things to be bought for the male which indicate you are the one. Ever wonder at the mystery of the disappearing socks and handkerchiefs? It is a mystery that requires the services of Fox and Mulder for sure. One day the drawer will be overflowing with socks and handkerchiefs and underwear and the next morning, the man will be standing in front of same said open drawer and hopping on both feet because he cannot find a single matching pair of socks, and all the handkerchiefs are not ones that can be taken out in a public situation, all my handkerchiefs having invaded his space, and his handkerchiefs having fled in horror to the land where they cannot be compelled by embroidered female kerchiefs to mate and produce embroidered offspring. It is a male thing. The same thing happens to the child’s socks and handkerchiefs.Β One morning the drawer is overflowing with enough socks to create a mini football league. The next, I’m scrounging around in the deep dark recesses of the cupboard to find any which might have fallen out of said drawer and reached unreachable places to ensure they can never be found without the entire contents of the wardrobe being dumped on the bed, with five minutes to eight on the clock, eightΒ am being the run out as you are time needed if said spawn of womb is to make it into the school gates beforeΒ the bell.

The next time I do my duty shopping to validate my status as ‘The One’ I am so buying yellow and black argyle socks and cherry printed undies.

Edited to add: Let me sign off with this very very valid quote from the feature.

“This is the one issue that feminism has never addressed,” Faucherand (Debenhams Head of Men’s Accessories Buying, Rob Faucherand) said. “It’s not who wears the pants in each household – it’s who has to buy them that counts.”

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About Kiran Manral

Author of The Face At The Window, ( 2016), Karmic Kids, All Aboard (2015) , Once Upon A Crush (2014) and The Reluctant Detective (2011).
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

29 Responses to Do you buy your man’s undies?

  1. Solilo says:

    Oh dear! Ha..ha..ha.. No.

    Like

  2. Lara says:

    OMG…I just realized that if your post is true, I am the ONE for my man! I always buy his underwear! Your post made my day when you speak about Fox and Mulder. As the two agents did not want to bother coming to my place to find the lost socks of the man (and mine as well), I bought something online not to lose them on this website http://www.sockfix.com. By the way, I would like to know how many people the Reuters news workers did poll to get to that conclusion (just to be sure that the poll is well done and that the answer can be taken seriously). Take care

    Here you go!
    http://www.smh.com.au/lifestyle/lifematters/mens-underwear-key-to-fidelity-20091111-i915.html

    Like

  3. Tara says:

    hahahaha! this is so true! I dont buy his undies but have to coax him to go and buy a pair every now and then! I often see myself pushing him to men’s UG department when we go shopping in malls πŸ˜€

    Thats a good compromise to reach. THe husband on the other hand never comes mall hopping with us, so the task is left to yours truly.

    Like

  4. Poppy says:

    LOL. I don’t buy/wash/fold/put away his undies. The only time I encounter them is by accident and during err..

    OMG – does that mean I’m not the one!?

    OMG, OMG, OMG. Poppy!!!

    Like

  5. Maria says:

    he he..i hate to confess but i do! and have been at the job for last 3 years…but thanks to me his undies come in many colors now πŸ™‚

    Now isnt that adding a dash of colour to his life. πŸ˜‰

    Like

  6. Tara says:

    i was a lil surprised to see my name up there n a comment:) coz i just came n read this yet another interesting post of yours.. hvnt seen many by this name..

    Thankfully my husband takes care of his u/g but i did buy a pack of rumaals for him recently..socks too.. wonder why undies are big deal but yes, i will let him buy them for himself..

    You are a sensible person.

    Like

  7. Homecooked says:

    LOL…no I dont buy…just force him to buy πŸ™‚

    Good enough.

    Like

  8. Orange Jammies says:

    Have you ever heard a rendition of Holey Socks, lyrics and composition by yours truly? Now that’s the mystery of my missing wedding ring.

    I need to so hear it from you, Jammies.

    Like

  9. Abha says:

    hahaha!

    yes i buy em for him the times he hasnt bothered to.

    handkerchiefs and socks most defi! and right now out of 5 pairs of socks and half a dozen rumaals, we have 2 “pairs” of socks and half the number of hankies! gah!!!!!

    Where do they go? I have even resorted to keeping a clothesline in my balcony to track them down and put them out to dry and take them out myself but still, they just disappear into a sock/handkerchief black hole in closet.

    awesome post!!

    cheers!

    Like

  10. Aathira says:

    Ha ha… now I see what I shall be getting into post marriage! πŸ˜‰

    Bewarned.

    Like

  11. shilpadesh says:

    Hehe cherry printed undies and argyle socks.

    Speaking of argyle, why do men think argyle is gay? I think men look sharp and refined in arglye, the husband thinks otherwise!

    Also, I agree with lazy. Men are lazy!

    I dont know about the gay, I just think theyre ugly…. especially the red and navy argyle patterns…

    Like

  12. Chips says:

    Nope. He is quite particular about what he likes, as with all his other clothes. Though I have to nag to get him to go shopping, with me giving unsolicited expert comments.
    The only mens handkerchiefs in the house are used in the making of paneer!

    Good for you. One task off your head.

    Like

  13. Smitha says:

    Oh, this is so my story! If I leave it to husband – he would still be wearing 10 year old undies πŸ™‚ And the chaos in the morning is so my story too! The exact same thing happens every few days πŸ™‚

    I think this is kahani ghar ghar ki.

    Like

  14. M says:

    Huh – I buy ALL his clothes, innerwear/outerwear/shoes – and have since the day we were married! I do the same for the whole household (Except daughter, whose tastes are already (at age 7) sharply divergent from mine, and so needs consultation before buying!) And he wears Argyle, even likes it – a fondness for golf may have contributed to this liberal attitude towards argyle – but AFAIK, Argyle is perfectly “normal” on men here in the US.

    M

    Argyle is normal. I did not say twas gay. Its just ugly. Just clarifying πŸ˜‰
    I dont do the clothes, shoes, belts, thank god because he and I have very very different tastes. He likes vibrant colours. I live in black, grey and brown. Thaswhy. Now even the child chooses his own clothes. But the undies are still my department.

    Like

  15. Namrata says:

    Hahaha … Pretty interesting .. btw stores get such innovative ideas… i think in way outcome (the buying pattern) is true. I shop for a lot for my hubby and sometimes undies tooo….

    Too much time for technology .. is what men like and do

    – namz

    True.

    Like

  16. LOL at cherry printed undies…do tell me how that works out πŸ™‚

    I can tell the future. They will be hurled at my head in a fit of rage.

    Like

  17. ha ha ha ROFL

    i read this report too and no I am not the one.. me doesnt buy his undies 😦 πŸ˜‰

    and yes the disappearing socks i think a movie can be made on that

    Alas.

    Like

  18. tenalirama says:

    Insightful Indeed..or shld i say Inside full πŸ™‚

    Like

  19. Veena says:

    No, I don’t. Though I may have “encouraged” him to buy a couple times. Do you also want to check with you readers on how many husbands have bought lingerie for their wives, especially if it involved a trip to Victoria’s Secret??? A frind’s spouse used to look forward to those trips and described bras as “engineering marvels” !!!

    Well, mine doesnt. He’s quite happy with me wearing horse harnesses. :((
    It would definitely be interesting to find out the percentage of men who buy their wives lingerie.

    Like

  20. Nova says:

    Gulp! That would be an EMPHATIC no!! πŸ˜•
    πŸ™‚

    Like

  21. Poppy says:

    Mine buys me lingerie ! All the time – nice ones too. Does that mean he’s the one for me, but I’m not the one for him! lol

    You got it!

    Like

  22. sands says:

    I buy his undies and we never have socks, though when I do laundry, that’s all i see coming out of the dryer!
    There must be a sock nation where these keep running to!!
    You have a way with words I must say!

    πŸ™‚

    Like

  23. M says:

    heh – mine buys me lingerie – though he says its pointless πŸ™‚

    Argyle ugly? I think you just stuck a knife in EVERY golf-wear designer’s heart! πŸ˜€

    M

    Its just me. I have strange taste.

    Like

  24. Gypsy Girl says:

    grin! Its my job here coz according to the man – i love shopping and he is just indulging me! πŸ™‚

    Undie shopping for the man is far from my idea of retail therapy but it is a necessary task to be done on the grocery list…you know, if not for me his undies would bacteria disintegrate into cottage cheese holey numbers…

    Like

  25. Chris says:

    Lol. True most of mums are buying underwear for their sons

    Interesting isnt it.

    Like

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