From a 90 year old

Written by Regina Brett, 90 years old, of the Plain Dealer, Cleveland, Ohio
“To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught
me. It is the most-requested column I’ve ever written.”
My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more:
1. Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and
parents will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don’t have to win every argument.. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.
8. Its OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.
12. Its OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey
is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don’t worry; God never
blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind & soothes the soul
17. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It’s never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up
to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an
answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t
save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow..
23. Be eccentric now. Don’t wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words ‘In five years, will
this matter?’
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or
didn’t do.
35. Don’t audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative – dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d
grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time.. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come.
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Listen, yield and share hugs and knowledge with abandon.
45. Life isn’t tied with a bow, but it’s still a gift.”

And I’d like to add some of my own, from a 38 year old:

1]Get up, dress up, show up.

2] Never say no to work. No matter how boring it may seem, or how underpaid, or below your capabilities.

3] Respect your elders and listen when they talk. You’ll get to be an elder soon enough.

4] Your children are your chance at a second childhood. Enjoy them.

5] Eat whatever you like. But eat in moderation and make sure you work it off.

6] Always use sunscreen and a hat or an umbrella.

7] Take care of yourself (Especially for us women), no one else will.

8] Put your husband first. He came before the child and he will be with you after the child leaves the nest.

9]Dont talk with your mouth full.

10]If you cant say anything good about anyone, shut up.

11] Everyday, in every way, reaffirm to yourself that you are a wonderful person.

12] Try and help people. You never know when you will need some help yourself.

13] Cut out toxic people. Life is too short.

14] A relationship needs to be give and take. If you feel yours is all give and no take, its high time you got out of it.

15]Your body is a temple. Eat well. Sleep well. Exercise regularly.

16]Do one thing everyday that you look forward to.

17] A routine is very important for discipline, no matter how boring it may seem.

18] The world does not revolve around you.

19] Dont lie. No matter what.

20] Be gentle. Be polite. Be courteous. Be gracious. And when required, be a bitch.

About Kiran Manral

Kiran Manral is a writer and major social media influencer. After quitting her full-time journalist’s job when her son was born, Kiran became a mommy blogger on the internet, with a remarkably original voice. She was a journalist at The Asian Age, The Times of India, features editor Cosmopolitan, India Cultural Lead and Trend spotter at Gartner Iconoculture US, Senior Consultant at Vector Insights, Ideas Editor, SheThePeople.TV. Kiran is currently a celebrated author and an independent research and media consultant. She was shortlisted for the Femina Women Awards for Literary Contribution in 2017. The Indian Council of UN Relations (ICUNR) supported by the Ministry of Women and Children, Govt of India, awarded her the International Women’s Day Award 2018 for excellence in the field of writing. In 2021 she was awarded the Womennovator 1000 Women of Asia award. In 2022, she was named amongst the 75 Iconic Indian women in STEAM by Red Dot Foundation and Beyond Black, in collaboration with the Office of the Principal Scientific Advisor, Government of India, and British High Commission, New Delhi. Her novella, Saving Maya, was long-listed for the 2018 Saboteur Award, supported by the Arts Council of England in the UK. Her novels 'The Face At the Window’ and ‘Missing, Presumed Dead were both long-listed for Jio MAMI Word to Screen, and ‘The Face at the Window’ was showcased at the South Asian Film Festival 2019. The Kitty Party Murder was shortlisted for the Popular Choice award at the 2021 JK Papers TOI AutHER awards. Her other books include The Reluctant Detective, Once Upon A Crush, All Aboard, Karmic Kids-The Story of Parenting Nobody Told You, A Boy’s Guide to Growing Up, True Love Stories, 13 Steps to Bloody Good Parenting, Raising Kids with Hope and Wonder in Times of a Pandemic and Climate Change, More Things in Heaven and Earth and Rising: 30 Women Who Changed India. She also has published short stories in various magazines, in acclaimed anthologies like Have A Safe Journey, Boo, The Best Asian Speculative Fiction 2018, Grandpa’s Tales, Magical Women and City of Screams. Kiran lives in Mumbai with her family. Social media handles Twitter: https://twitter.com/KiranManral Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kiranmanral/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/KiranManralAuthorPage Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kiranmanral/
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13 Responses to From a 90 year old

  1. Rani says:

    Nice.
    If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.
    So true.

    Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t
    save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

    Equally true. 🙂

    Like

  2. R's Mom says:

    Great…I loved your list as much as the earlier one…you know..I just realised what you say is very true…’Put your husband first. He came before the child and he will be with you after the child leaves the nest.’…I better work on that one 🙂

    Like

  3. Nitya Karthik says:

    I so needed to read this. Both the lists. Thank u Kiran. You’ve helped me out of a blue funk.

    And the boy doesnt get you out of the funk with his cuteness?

    Like

  4. Shobana says:

    Thanks for sharing these lists and I loved most of them, but the last one…yours, will stick in my mind for a long time. It sounds hilarious, but it is true.Thanks again for this.

    🙂

    Like

  5. Mumbai Diva says:

    nice. very, very nice.

    🙂

    Like

  6. Sonia says:

    Thanks for sharing these lists !!! I do agree about the husband, not putting him first or the kid first but not forgetting to cherish that relationship. So many marriages disintegrate over time without them knowing how and when and then two old couples who were bound together by their children are left behind. So many of my friends say they couldnt go on a date as they wouldnt know what to say to their spouse sans kids…it scares me!

    Ditto. I feel the same, and am terrified into morphing into one of those couples.

    Like

  7. chandni says:

    wonderful. Thanks for posting Kiran. I’d like to believe I know and practice most of these already. but one can always learn more from others’ experience.

    If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d
    grab ours back.

    No no. I’ll keep mine there for someone else to pick up. 😉

    Like

  8. Sri says:

    Wow..such a wonderful post!!

    The points which touched me the most are:

    1. Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

    Absolutely. Makes the most sense.

    2. What other people think of you is none of your business.

    Like

  9. i so needed that. ancients can be useful after all 😉 (okay, okay just kidding. don’t flare up on me lady fire :))

    Of course. Its called the voice of experience.

    Like

  10. mandira says:

    this was a great post,K!! i found myself nodding in agreement at soooo many occasions!thanks for putting this up.. will be coming back to re-read it.. need to have some of those things ingrained in my head, u see!

    Just print out and put up on the soft board. Easier.

    Like

  11. Childwoman says:

    I really liked this, apart from myself, there are people i know could use this. Would you please forward this to my email id?

    Many thanks Madam K

    Just copy paste na.

    Like

  12. Krithiga says:

    First time commenting..was nodding to most of the items on this list. Need to visit it from time to time. Thanks!

    ~ Krithiga

    Always welcome.

    Like

  13. Niveditha says:

    Profound! Nice blog you have out here! 🙂

    Thank you.

    Like

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